most recent 30 from http://socialsounddesign.com 2013-05-25T06:12:17Z http://socialsounddesign.com/feeds/question/10494 http://www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.5/rdf http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes Iain McGregor 2011-09-23T12:15:49Z 2013-02-18T19:55:24Z

<p>A number of really funny jokes have cropped up in posts recently and I thought it would be nice to start a thread just for jokes.</p> <p>Here's one to start off.</p> <p>An indie film had just started filming when both the director and producer fell ill. No one wanted to take over, but the boom op's arms were already tired, and he thought that he'd like to sit down for a change.</p> <p>For the next 4 weeks the shoot went well, and at the wrap party the sound mixer bumped in to the former boom op and asked him where he had been for the last 4 weeks.</p> <p>Please share your audio jokes.</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10495#10495 gahoolecat 2011-09-23T15:16:40Z 2011-09-23T15:16:40Z

<p>What did the sound designer tell their child when they brought home a bad grade?</p> <p>No gain no pain!</p> <p><em>sitcom laugh track</em></p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10502#10502 Haydn Payne 2011-09-24T15:57:39Z 2011-09-24T15:57:39Z

<p>This is funny;</p> <p><a href="http://www.gearslutz.com/board/post-production-forum/497768-my-craigslist-ad-composer-looking-film-crew.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.gearslutz.com/board/post-production-forum/497768-my-craigslist-ad-composer-looking-film-crew.html</a></p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10507#10507 AGZFX 2011-09-24T19:49:39Z 2011-09-24T19:49:39Z

<p>...and then I said "Dither? I just met her!"</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10508#10508 Shaun Farley 2011-09-24T21:22:48Z 2011-09-24T21:22:48Z

<p>Two boom ops and a production sound mixer get into a car. Who's driving?</p> <p>.....</p> <p>The cop. [rimshot]</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10512#10512 Fred Pearson 2011-09-25T00:43:24Z 2011-09-25T00:43:24Z

<p>Where do Sound Engineers go on holiday??</p> <p>Patch Bay. </p> <p>(Full props go to Tarek Musa for this joke)</p> <p>Cheers</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10542#10542 Colin Hart 2011-09-27T01:19:21Z 2011-09-27T01:19:21Z

<p>Here's a few I remember:</p> <p>What do you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?</p> <p>A Flat Miner!</p> <hr> <p>Why do sound guys say "Check, One Two, One Two"</p> <p>Because on three, you have to lift!</p> <hr> <p>How many freelance sound recordists does it take to change a light bulb?</p> <p>Six. One to change it, and five to stand around saying "I was offered that job."</p> <hr> <p>How many sound mixers does it take to change a light bulb?</p> <p>One, but only after the airplane is gone.</p> <hr> <p>How tall is a sound mixer?</p> <p>I don't know, I've never seen one stand up!</p> <hr> <p>Difference between a toilet and a sound mixer?</p> <p>A toilet only has to take crap from one a$$hole at a time!</p> <hr> <p>What is the difference between a producer and a chimpanzee? </p> <p>It's scientifically proven that chimpanzees are able to communicate with humans!</p> <hr> <p>Why is a concert grand better than a studio upright? </p> <p>It makes a bigger <em>kaboom!</em> when dropped off a cliff!</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10560#10560 jb1t 2011-09-27T19:23:45Z 2011-09-27T19:23:45Z

<p>When setting up complex mic arrays it's important to get everything at the same height. I use a drummer, when the stage is level the drool comes out both corners of his mouth.</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10686#10686 jb1t 2011-10-04T11:08:32Z 2011-10-04T11:08:32Z

<p>What's the frequency Kenneth?</p> <p>Everybody Hz</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10687#10687 Markus 2011-10-04T12:37:44Z 2011-10-04T14:21:02Z

<p>How do you call a musician without a girl friend? A homeless. ..</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10757#10757 ChrisSound 2011-10-07T00:30:18Z 2011-10-07T00:30:18Z

<p>Paul's Extreme Time Stretch will give you an orgasm that can last for days.</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10760#10760 NoiseJockey 2011-10-07T02:44:38Z 2011-10-07T02:44:38Z

<p>Damn. All I've got is a dubstep joke.</p> <p>KNOCK KNOCK.</p> <p>Who's there?</p> <p>BOB.</p> <p>Bob who?</p> <p>BOB WOB WOB WOB WOB</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10772#10772 Tumppi 2011-10-07T12:54:28Z 2011-10-07T12:54:28Z

<ol> <li><p>"How is acoustic in your studio?" "Don't know. Bring your own."</p></li> <li><p>Band was going to play a gig at the local sports center. They asked what kind of acoustics the place had. They were answered that after wrestling events it was bad but once windows are opened it will get better.</p></li> </ol>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10777#10777 Matthew M 2011-10-07T17:31:15Z 2011-10-07T17:31:15Z

<p>How many music producers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?</p> <p>I don't know what do you think?</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10786#10786 Filipe Chagas 2011-10-07T22:02:54Z 2011-10-07T22:02:54Z

<p>Not really sound, but i say it on sets a lot</p> <p>How many cigarettes does a DP smoke a day?</p> <p>One.</p> <p>Why?!!!</p> <p>It takes him all f$%&amp;$n day to light it.</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/10849#10849 Filipe Chagas 2011-10-11T14:51:32Z 2011-10-11T14:51:32Z

<p>Just came up with a really lame one.</p> <p>He's not stereotypical. He's surroundotypical.</p> <p>Face palm.</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/14830#14830 bob 2012-07-31T14:10:20Z 2012-07-31T14:10:20Z

<p>Why Does a music producer call his first child 'bass'?</p> <p>because no one will complain when he drops it.</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/14858#14858 theodorejordan 2012-08-02T01:56:51Z 2012-08-02T01:56:51Z

<p>Knock knock.</p> <ul> <li>Who's there?</li> </ul> <p>Foley guy.</p> <ul> <li>Foley guy, who?</li> </ul> <p>Ding dong!</p> <p>( still working on this one :P )</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/14867#14867 oinkaudio 2012-08-02T11:17:01Z 2012-08-02T11:17:01Z

<p>I have a foley joke which is more of a one liner than a set up scenerio.</p> <p>"Foley artists get to do everybody"</p>

http://socialsounddesign.com/questions/10494/share-your-audio-jokes/18181#18181 Utopia 2013-02-18T19:55:24Z 2013-02-18T19:55:24Z

<p>A blonde and a brunette are waiting in line for an audition.</p> <p>The brunette turns to the blonde and says, "I'm going to f&amp;^% the director for this job. And maybe the producer. Who are you going to f&amp;^%?"</p> <p>The blonde turns to the brunette and says, "I'm going to f&amp;^% the sound guy."</p> <p>Brunette: "Why are you going to f&amp;^% the sound guy? He doesn't make decisions on who gets what part..."</p> <p>Blonde: "Well, it's the most common advice everyone gives me when I'm on set. Everyone is constantly saying "f*&amp;^ the sound guy".</p>